V (1983) |
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Julie Parrish - Faye Grant Mike Donovan - Marc Singer Diana - Jane Badler Lydia - June Chadwick Ham Tyler - Michael Ironside Kyle Bates - Jeff Yagher Elizabeth Maxwell - Jennifer Cooke Nathan Bates - Lane Smith Robin Maxwell - Blair Tefkin Willie - Robert Englund 
OTHER V SEASONS V: The Mini Series V: The Final Battle V (2010) OTHER ALIEN INVASION SERIES Invasion Dark Skies Threshold UFO
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Liberation DayOne year after the day that humanity fought back and drove the lizard aliens from the Earth, alien leader Diana is freed from custody and the human/alien hybrid starchild undergoes a startling transformation. The danger from the aliens is far from over. The two miniseries of V were event television, created on a scale that overcame some of the creakiness of the writing and variable acting performances. The opening episode of this weekly series shows a serious lack of scale (Diana, the greatest war criminal of all time) gets a four motorcycle security detail and is met by a very small crowd of onlookers? That seems hardly likely to say the least. Many of the original cast return, bringing with them their variable acting. Michael Ironside is as dependable as ever as hard nut mercenary Tyler and Jane Badler remains all sneers and cheekbones as queen alien Diana. Faye Grant and Marc Singer are as wooden as ever as the lead pair and the significant new arrival is Lane Smith, chewing up the scenery as the slimy businessman willing to anything to turn a fast buck. The plotting is fairly risible and serves only to bring the whole series back to its original starting point and only the appearance of some real live rattlesnakes enlivens it. In going to a weekly series, it seems only the show’s most outrageous and nonsensical facets have been retained. Top DreadnoughtElizabeth emerges from her transformation as a young woman. The Visitors start an all-out assault on the planet. The Red Dust continues to protect some parts, but not Los Angeles. Diana plans to wipe the city out using a space-based particle beam weapon shortly after signing a peace treaty there. The fighting starts again in earnest and there is at least a real sense that it is happening. Sadly, this is presented with some stock footage from the miniseries and other films and shows. It’s all too obvious and rather sad. At least the show is willing to kill of a relatively major character early on in the season to show that nobody is safe. The introduction of another female Visitor leader seems more aimed at giving Diana someone to bitch at rather than someone to challenge her. Top BreakoutLooking for Donovan’s son, Sean, he and Tyler are taken prisoner and end up in the same prison camp as Robin Maxwell and the son of the shady industrialist who is treading a fine line between collaborator and realist freedom fighter. The escape route is guarded by subterranean monsters brought by the Visitors. The budgetary limits of the show are even more obvious here than they have been to date. The monster that does the killing is shown only as a fin moving through the sand, but where JAWS had an unconvincing shark, this show doesn’t even have a monster. The scenes where its victims are drawn underground are embarrassing. Top The DeceptionDonovan is taken prisoner and wakes up married to Juliet and living with his son, not to mention short term amnesia. It’s Diana’s plan to get him to reveal the place where starchild Elizabeth is to be put on a helicopter bound for New York. It’s an old story, the one where the character wakes up and finds out that the life he knew is either a lie or an old memory that has taken him over. The fact that Donovan falls for it so easily is about the only original thing that happens in the whole of the borrowed storyline, though the live mice masquerading as cream cakes brings back memories of the shock when first the Visitors’ dietary preferences were made clear. Unfortunately, it is hard to believe that Donovan doesn’t notice that his cream cake is wriggling. Even harder to believe is the writing of Kyle Bates’ part in all of this. When he first encountered Robin in the scrubland and didn’t know her from the prisoner camp that they shared it is possible to let it go. It could be that they were in different parts of the camp and never met. When he completely fails to recognise Tyler, whom he helped tease in the last episode and Tyler completely fails to recognise him despite asking him his name for the second time, all sense of reality is sent right out of the window. Was nobody checking script continuity that week? As usual, the climactic action sequence is lame. Considering how important the starchild is to Diana, taking only half a dozen soldiers to capture her is staggeringly incompetent. Top The SanctionDonovan goes after his son and finds himself targeted by a master alien assassin following a less than enthusiastic welcome. As it was with the miniseries, so it is with this weekly version. Donovan can waltz in and out of Visitor central whenever he wants to with almost no resistance. For a race that has dominated the galaxy, the Visitors clearly don’t know a thing about security. Then again, the alien super-killing machine proves to be far less than advertised. His skill is limited to swapping a hand for a mini-whip and failing to hit anything he swings it at. Donovan, for his part, manages to knock the bad guy out and then fails to finish him off when he has the perfect opportunity. Also, despite all that they know about the Visitors’ brainwashing techniques, nobody seems willing to secure Donovan’s son and treat him like the potential threat that he is. Top Visitors' ChoiceDA new machine for processing humans into food at a greater rate is being demonstrated in Visitor territory. This gives the resistance a chance to strike at several high-profile targets. Meanwhile, the son of the city’s shady leader finds out just how far he can push his father. Another hugely important Visitor base with supposedly intense security is infiltrated and attacked with incredible ease. Even when alerted to the presence of the infiltrators, the guards are unable to hit a single resistance fighter whilst those fighters are unable to miss a single guard. This has always been one of the great failings of the show’s writing. The continuous battle between Nathan Bates and his son Kyle also reaches a new level, though not a particularly interesting one. The father finally chooses to take the gloves off and treat his son just like anyone else. His master torturer doesn’t seem to be that much of a master. It helps that Elizabeth proves to be a handy get out of jail free card for the writers. Top The OverlordDiana’s operation to mine cobalt using a town full of hostages comes to the attention of the Resistance. Meanwhile, Julie Parrish comes to the attention of Nathan Bates’ right hand man, who is tasked with locating the traitor within Bates’ organisation. Nathan Bates’ right hand man proves to be the human equivalent of the aliens’ guards. He is so easily duped out of the proof that Julie is the traitor within that it is almost painful to watch. Then again, so much of this series is painful to watch. At least the cobalt mine scenario has a twist in it. The mice-eating scene is back and the sandshark attack proves to be every bit as rubbish as it was in previous episodes. TopThe DissidentDiana and Nathan Bates plan to use an impenetrable force field to seal off Los Angeles. The Resistance’s only hope is a Visitor scientist who happens to be a pacifist and conscientious objector. It's time for another trip into the Visitors’ most heavily guarded place time as two humans successfully hijack a shuttle and fly into the mothership where they are free to wander around with nobody checking their ID even once. Even after the alarm is sounded, they are able to escape, though they do at least get shot down whilst doing so. Bates is definitely becoming a darker character, more of a tyrant and less of a benefactor. His character is the only one that seems to have any development at all. The Deus ex Machina ending is disappointing to say the least. Top Reflections In TerrorIt’s Christmas and Diana’s present to Elizabeth is a killer clone of the Starchild, one being hunted by the Visitors’ finest trackers. Julie’s cover in Nathan Bates’ operation is getting close to breaking. This is an apt title for the episode as we should all reflect on the horror that is genre television Christmas episodes. The big victim here is Michael Ironside’s Ham Tyler character who is forced to act so far out of character that he might be in a different show altogether. The story of Julie’s unmasking as the mole in Bates’ organisation is the most satisfying one, even if it does have the effrontery to lift the entire ‘Marseillaise’ sequence from CASABLANCA without so much as hanging its head in shame. The cloned Starchild storyline suffers from a lack of development. The clone is born, goes on the run and searches out Elizabeth, but no character is developed in the clone itself, so its purpose and its fate are poorly explained and ineffective. The character of the alien tracker is set up for something much better than he actually gets. It’s Christmas, though, and the season of goodwill, so not the best time to say that this marks the series’ lowest point to date. TopThe ConversionIt’s Christmas and Diana’s present to Elizabeth is a killer clone of the Starchild, one being hunted by the Visitors’ finest trackers. Julie’s cover in Nathan Bates’ operation is getting close to breaking. Lydia returns to the Visitor fleet and brings with her Charles, a charismatic new leader. His first plan is to brainwash the recently captured Ham Tyler into killing Donovan with the whole world watching on TV. It was bad enough with Diana and Lydia playing handbags at dawn, but Charles proves to be about the most camp bad guy ever. He wanders around with his chest bared and preens himself every moment that he is on screen. He’s a bigger diva than either of the female leaders. Michael Ironside gets to play a tortured man and does it better than the show deserves, but then he has consistently been the best thing in it. The torture process itself is pretty lame, consisting of showing Ham his lost wife and daughter kissing Donovan in a dream. At least the outcome of the action is unexpected. TopThe HeroFriends of the Resistance are taken prisoner to be executed one by one on television unless the Resistance leaders surrender. Robin finds herself attracted to one of them, a man who proves to be a real hero. The death of a major(ish) character is a significant matter for most shows, but the surprise here is the way that it is just a throwaway gesture, coming out of nowhere and achieving nothing. This is an unexpected, and unusual, moment of reality in what is becoming an ever sillier show. The presence of Bruce Davison goes a long way to upping the acting credibility, but the action remains utterly unimpressive and completely unbelievable. It’s also hard to take seriously the sight of Donovan being beaten up by a medallion man. TopThe BetrayalWillie is mortally wounded and the team kidnap a Visitor doctor to save him. Robin learns the truth about her new boyfriend, Kyle learns the truth about his father and the Resistance learns the truth about Charles caching arms in the city. There’s a major sense of the show clearing the decks and it can’t be any surprise that it isn’t doing very well because it really isn’t very good. With Elias killed last week and this week seeing and end to the whole Nathan Bates saga, plus a postscript in which one of the most annoying and one of the most enjoyable characters both walk off the show sees several of the big hitters removed, possibly to lower the wage bill. It’s all utterly ridiculous and not for a moment believable, even wimping out on the big explosion that the dialogue promises several times as the arms cache is rigged to explode. It’s hard to see how the show can get any worse, but the changes made may just have guaranteed it. TopThe RescueDiana launches an all-out assault on Los Angeles. Charles decides to deal with her once and for all, by marrying her! Julie, meanwhile, has a pregnant woman in the war zone to deal with. The bad guys are always more interesting than the good guys and the writers clearly think so since they give the Resistance almost no story at all whilst the Visitors scheme and plot. Admittedly, they scheme and plot like cast members in a soap opera pantomime, but it’s certainly better than what’s happening back on earth. The levels of camp grow ever higher as the wedding takes place, foregrounding the woeful Visitor makeup and the bug-eyed dead alien causes laughter more than shock. TopThe ChampionDonovan comes to the aid of a mother and daughter caught up in a fight between them and some corrupt cops running the area for the Visitors. The new legal overseer decrees that Diana and Lydia shall fight to the death to see who killed Charles. The much-vaunted advanced civilisation of the Visitors boils down to a cat fight in a gladiatorial arena that screams ‘cheap’ at the top of its voice. All of these shenanigans are ridiculously over the top and the trash talk between the two women tops it all. Sadly, the events on Earth are so mundane that the inanity in space is the more entertaining, though for all the wrong reasons. TopThe WildcatsDiptheria is devastating the human population in a valley outside of the city. Attempts to bring in the medicine received rely upon a street gang known as the Wildcats, but the Visitors seem to know everything that is about to happen before it does. Willie the alien’s love troubles are the most fun part of this nonsense, which is a pretty depressing state of affairs, though foregrounding Robert Englund is never a bad idea, though a better script would always be handy. Events on the mothership get even sillier as Diana and Lydia are forced to work together to frame someone for Charles’ murder or enjoy the honour of being ejected into space in his coffin with his corpse. At least Diana gets to show just how evil she can be, though for absolutely no other reason than spite against nobody of any interest to her. Still, what other reason does a true villain need? TopThe Littlest DragonNew fleet Commander Philip chases a Fifth Columnist deserter and his heavily pregnant wife, hoping to find and kill Donovan, whom he holds responsible for the death of his brother, Martin. The dreadful green monster baby prop that was the worst thing in both miniseries combined makes a comeback in this episode and completely destroys any hope of reality that the episode had of being taken seriously. Robert Englund takes to the foreground again as Willie, but is required to play the comedy sidekick more than has been true of late. Aside from that, there are all kinds of machinations between Diana, Lydia and Philip involving an assassin from Philip’s past. Sadly, all of this sounds much more interesting than it actually is with only the firer of the last shot being of any surprise. TopThe Littlest DragonThe alien Leader has devised an unbeatable battle plan that will wipe out the whole of the Resistance in the south west of the USA. It has been fed into the all-controlling battlesphere. The Resistance’s only hope is a hacker whose father has just been taken into custody. The alien’s top computer bears an uncanny resemblance to a plasma sphere and the supposedly advanced computers of the time look outdated even by the broadcast date’s standards. Add to that the constant recycling not only of special effects shots, but now of actual acting sequences and things are looking very desperate indeed, and we’re not just talking about in the story now. Elizabeth is being used more and more as a Get Out Of Jail Free card that the writers can throw at any problem, but that doesn’t improve matters any. TopSecret UndergroundJulie and Donovan have to go aboard the Mothership to get back a list of the Resistance’s top people. There, they encounter an old love of Julie’s who might just be working for the aliens. Once again, the aliens’ most wanted are allowed to wander freely around the most important ship in the fleet. Admittedly, they get captured more than once, but the escapes and the heightened state of alarm that should exist following their appearance make everything utterly unbelievable. And that’s even before we get to the masks under masks nonsense. It’s flashback city as well with Julie and her ex surfing the wavy screen back to a truly dull past romance that makes everything that she and Donovan have been through seem unreal (he was happy to think that he was married to her not so very long ago). The continuing political machinations between Philip, Diana and Lydia are at least labyrinthine, though with all of this going on it’s hard to guess how they are managing to run a fleet and fight a war as well. TopThe ReturnThe Leader decides that it is time for the war to end and declares a ceasefire. His only request is that Elizabeth meets with him. Both sides meet uneasily on the Mothership, but Diana is not yet ready to have her power base removed. After a full series that has failed to impress in the way that the miniseries managed to do, the show comes up with one last surprise. The arrival of peace is as sudden as it is unlikely. The Leader does a total U-Turn for no reason whatsoever. Diana continues to scheme, but they are desperate machinations that seem rather silly considering the backdrop of universal peace, but then what in this series has not been silly? The action is also a bit lame with a half-assed ritual swordfight being the best of it. And as for the Leader well his final revelation is somewhat underwhelming to say the least. The cliffhanger is also pretty poor, guaranteeing that we will never find out precisely what happens next. Top |
